July 12, 2001

Hey everyone!!!!!! I am leaving for Spain tomorrow so this will be my last entry for a month or so.  I am really excited to go to experience the new culture and everything but i m nervous at the same time.  I always have the fear that things could go wrong, but i think it will be an awesome time!!!!  I'll miss everyone though dearly, i hope you hav an awesome summer!!!!!  See you when i get back, luv ya!!!!!!!!! 

July 11, 2001

Hey guys!!!!!! This is probably gonna be my second last entry before i leave.  So i will start by venting,  well i am really pissed off b/c some of my friends came to wish me goodbye and my parents wouldn't let me see them at all, they made me go pack and i didn't even get to say goodbye.  But otherwise i had a good day, i went to the amusement park nearby and went w/some friends and it was a blast and later we went to my friends house.  Yesterday was awesome too, I went and bought a lot of supplies for my trip and i found a top that matches the skirt in the second set of photos at aero and it was only 2 dollars. that's like unheard of at aero if you heard of the place.  My friends came over last nite and they let me try on their shoes, they also made my hair curly and it looked pretty cute actually.  Well i am kinda nervous about leaving but kinda excited hopefully it will turn out good. But how could it not, neways luv ya'll.  O yea happy birthday to the site, its' a month old.  

July 9, 2001

Morning

Hey everyone, I'm back.  Also some good news i should get my new photos back today, so they will be up soon.  Well I went to DC over the weekend, we did all the touristy stuff so our exchange student could see it all, but i hadn't been there in a while and they added a lot of stuff.  I love going to the city but i don't think i could ever live there.  While i was there i got to see some of my friends from summer camp that i hadn't seen in a long time, it was so exciting, they were just like i remembered them and it was so neat to talk to them again, god i missed them, everyone from summer camp is so awesome and sweet there is nothing like it on earth.  I wasn't expecting all that much of the DC trip, but it was actually a total blast!!!!! I wish i could have stayed longer.   Let's see what else happened well in a way i m kinda sad right now because lots of my friends are gone around here and lots of people from the net don't come on as much and it's sad b/c i really miss everyone!!!!    I get lonely really easily it's pretty sad, that's one thing i hate being alone.  On a happier note my site reached 2000 hits yesterday and that's in less than a month, thanks to everyone who came, i hope the site helped you.   

Night

I forgot to tell you guys i also i started wearing tank tops when i sleep now, it's so much more comfortable than t-shirts and i love the site when i wake up and look at myself, hehe.   I just added my third set of photos they look a lot better than the first two i think, i hope you like them.  

July 5, 2001

Well i really wanted to see Scary Movie 2 today, but i got grounded for cursing at the rents. :-(  I am a sucker for those really crude comedies.  Well I just wanted to tell ya'll, i leave for DC tomorrow, so i won't be home for 3 days, i'll miss ya'll though!!!!!! See ya when I Get Back, Hugs! 

July 4, 2001

Hey everyone!!!!!!!! I hope you all had a good fourth of july!!!!!!!!  Hopefully it was a good excuse to party anyways.   Today i put my hair up for the first time ever, it turned out pretty cute and most people liked it, it's kinda short though still and i couldn't get that much up, but it is a preview of what is to come.  I had a lil fourth of july shindig which was a lot of fun, i also went to some fireworks and it was a good time.   I want to thank everyone for all the wonderful compliments and support, i love you all!!!!!!!   

July 3, 2001

Yesterday i went to Dorney Park, it's a local park in my town.  It was a lot of fun and my friend julianne and her boyfriend went.  whenever they did something we would do the same thing, except my gf did what her boyfriend di and i did what she did, it was so cute.  Like when her boyfriend picked her up, my gf would, i loved it so much, hehe!!!!!!!!  Yesterday i also did a new photo shoot, no new outfits really but, my gf took thie pictures this time instead of the timer, so it probably came out a lot better, the makeup was also a lot better, i used purple eyeshadow and peach lip gloss.   Well i'll put them up sometime before i leave, i hope you like them.  Today i went down to philly, we visited all the old historic sites, so our exchange student could see them.  It was a lot of fun and my friend racheal came, she has been really helpful with my transitioning and all and i showed her some pics of t girls and she would absolutely not believe that it was possible for someone who was once a guy to make that beautiful of a woman.  Happy 4th everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   May the principles this country was built on forever endure.  

July 1, 2001

Let's see what happened, i went to six flags on friday.  It was really fun, they rides are really good, a lot of them were broken down though.  The lines were pretty short and i got to go on the new one the Nitro, it was fun.  Yesterday i went shopping which i also absolutely love.  I didn't get any new cloths but i got some new nail polish and lip gloss.  Later that night i went to this punk concert which was not so hot.  Then today i had one of those 4th of July picnics, it was pretty boring.  I have been feeling pretty good lately about myself because i really know who i want to be in life and everyone has been so nice, thanks for all your support.  I am going to Spain in two weeks and i'll be gone for a month, i'll miss you guys!!!!!!!!!  Hope all your summer's are going good.

June 27, 2001

Well i had my senior pictures today and i wanted to wear something more unisex but my mom would have nothing of it.  so i settled for the old suit, tie thing to my dismay, i figured since she was payin for the pictures i ought to appease her.  It really bothered me though i so can't stand being a guy, i just hope i don't have to do it for the rest of my life.  It's just so hard when you see how beautiful your girlfriends look and you can't be like you want.  Well it's also been really hard lately b/c lots of my friends are going away and i won't see them for a long time but of course i am going away to Spain for a month, so i guess it won't be all that terrible.  I am really hoping tomorrow that i get to get some new makeup.  I am really excited too because tomorrow is me and my girlfriend's year and a half anniversary.  I'm so excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

June 24, 2001

Hey guys, how is everyone?????   I saw dave last ntie, it was so awesome i love him live.  His concerts are so powerful.  i really loved when he played rapunzel and tripping billies.  if you like dave the setlist was:

Setlist
JTR *+
Best of Whats Around +
Satellite *
The Space Between *+
Rhyme & Reason
Mother Father *+
Everyday (#36) *+
Pantala Naga Pampa * -->
Rapunzel *
What You Are *
Sleep To Dream Her * -->
Grace Is Gone *
Jimi Thing
When The World Ends *
Granny *+
True Reflections *+
Stay *+
encore:
Waste
Tripping Billies *

Welll neways, i won't go on about it too much about it.  this past weekend i was thinkin a lot though about my life. and i was thinking how i want to be in 5 or 10 years.  and i hav pretty much decided i need to be a girl.  well hopefully someday i will get there hehe.  

June 21, 2001

Well yesterday i went to a pool and got a lil more tan it was nice.  Something funny happened to i found out that like my friend i always talk to online that i have never met actually works there, it is so coincidental.  Today i also had a really good therapy session.   I had been feeling more and more confused lately but today i cleared some things up.  It turns out my confusion is actually cover for my fear which i kinda already knew.  my therapist said i know what i want i m just afraid to get it.  So that was a really good step in the right direction.   tonight a saw shrek, it was really good, very clver.  i know i see movies all the time, i m such a flik chik.  see everyone later.  

June 18, 2001

Oh my god, the site got over 650 hits in its inaugural week!!!!!!   Thanks for all ur support!!!! I had my end of the school year party on Saturday Night and it was so much fun.  41 people came, but the thing that made it the best was that my friend's band came and played live. It was the best party I have ever had.  Last night, we drove up to NYC to pick up our exchange student from spain.  His name is Vicente and he is very nice and good looking too. He seems a little bit masculine though, i don't know if i am going to come out to him.  Also tonite i went and saw tomb raider the movie.  I love Lara Croft, i so wish i could be like her, she is totally the woman i want to be.  

June 15, 2001

Thanks to everyone who has visited the site, I love you all!!!! well recently i have been really questioning my sexuality.  I love my girlfriend to death but i think i may be bi.  I am not sure but i am definitely curious.  Today started the string of graduation parties that are happening this weekend.  They have been a lot of fun!!!!! I was put on the spot though at one about my nail polish.  At the other though, all the girls liked the color, some of them even had it, it was so exciting!!!!!!! The color is light blue by the way, that's like my fav color.  

June 13, 2001

Well my website has gotten off to a really good start, it has almost 300 hits already!!!!!! Thanks everyone and thanks for all the input.   Last night i received some more random harassment when i went with my friends to the amusement park.  I also learned that lots of people refer to me as an "it" now.  I mean it's kinda degrading but it's better than him i guess. School ended yesterday so I am like so happy!!!!!!!! 

June 11, 2001

After sitting and thanking, i finally decided i would start a website.  All the websites I see on the net always empower me.  When i read others stories, i feel comforted knowing i m not alone in my struggles.  I admire any one who is not afraid to express their individuality in any means possible.  I hope that i can give back some of the courage i was given by others, this hopefully will serve those means.  I also saw my new psychologist today and he has seen transgendered people before so I am really excited.  Hopefully i will be able to better understand myself.

 

© Brandi Marie 2001